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a short play by Tom Flannery copyright 2006
Cast:
SARA is alone onstage…peering off into the
distance. She wears a winter coat with a skull cap completely covering
her head. She is clutching a rosary and occasionally jumps up and down
trying to stay warm. After a few moments, MISSY wanders onstage and wonders
what SARA is looking at. MISSY stands behind her and tries to see….but
can’t figure it out. Finally, after about a minute of this, MISSY walks
up behind her and speaks.
MISSY: What are you looking at? SARA: (startled) Oh…you scared me. MISSY: Sorry. SARA: That’s Ok. MISSY: I was just wondering what you’re looking at. SARA: Mary. MISSY: Mary who? SARA: Mary. You know. Mary. MISSY: (not getting it) Mary….. SARA: The Virgin Mary. MISSY: I’m sorry? SARA: The Virgin Mary. You know….the Mother of God? MISSY: Yes, I’ve heard of her. You’re looking at her now? SARA: Yes. MISSY: Where? SARA: Right there. Can’t you see her? MISSY: See her where? SARA: Reflected in the light….there. MISSY: The Virgin Mary? SARA: Yes. MISSY: All I see is a basketball backboard. SARA: That’s where she is. MISSY: What? SARA: I said that’s where she is. MISSY: She’s on the backboard? SARA: Yes. MISSY: The Virgin Mary is on the backboard? SARA: Yes….can’t you see her? (she looks intently) MISSY: I see what looks like a streetlight shining on a backboard. SARA: Come stand over here. You have to see it from the right angle. (she moves over) Can you see her now? MISSY: Well…..I guess I see something. But it’s the light and shadows isn’t it? SARA: No. It’s Mary. Look….see what’s in her arms. MISSY: You can see her arms too? SARA: Yes…look. MISSY: (doubtful) I don’t know… SARA: She’s holding a baby. MISSY: Jesus I presume. SARA: Yes. MISSY: Why exactly would the Virgin Mary choose to appear on a basketball backboard? SARA: (offended) Where would you like her to appear? MISSY: I don’t know……maybe someplace a bit less…..secular. SARA: The Lord works in mysterious ways. MISSY: At least at Fatima it was on a mountain top or something. You know….something with a bit more pizzazz. Showing up on a backboard is almost like she’s rubbing our little blue collar noses in it. SARA: You sound ashamed. MISSY: What? SARA: You rather she appeared in Waverly or up at Glenmaura? MISSY: No…that’s not what I meant. SARA: Working class stiffs don’t deserve a visit from the Mother of God is it? MISSY: That’s not what I said. SARA: (indignant) My father toiled 10 hours a day in the mines just so we could have a better life… MISSY: (cuts her off) Alright alright….I’m sorry Mother Jones. Jeez. It’s just that it is a somewhat unique location. SARA: I’ll grant you that. MISSY: Not the first place you’d go looking for the Mother of God is all I’m saying. SARA: Probably not….but be that as it may…. MISSY: (cuts her off) I mean….what’s next? She gonna show up reflected on a ping pong table? SARA: Stop with the blaspheming. MISSY: What happens if the kid who lives in the house wants to come outside and practice his bank shot? He gonna get excommunicated? (SARA glares at her) You know where she should appear? I mean to get the most bang for the buck. (SARA glares again…waiting for the answer..) The drive inn. SARA: (bitter) Well….maybe next time. .MISSY: We have one at our house. SARA: You have a drive-inn at your house? MISSY: No no…a hoop like that….attached to the garage. SARA: Oh. Don’t see them much anymore. Most are the ones on poles. MISSY: Well…we bought an old house and it was already there so. SARA: You sound jealous. MISSY: What do you mean? SARA: That Mary isn’t on your backboard. MISSY: Well…maybe she’s making the rounds. SARA: I doubt it. MISSY: Do you have a backboard? SARA: No. MISSY: If you did she’s probably pick yours. SARA: Damn right she would. MISSY: You don’t have to be so self righteous. SARA: I’m not. MISSY: You are. Judge not lest ye be judged. SARA: Who’s judging? MISSY: You are. You’re treating me like an unbeliever. SARA: What do you see up there? MISSY: I see an odd reflection from the light. SARA: And I see the Virgin Mary holding the baby Jesus. MISSY: (indignant) See….that’s what I mean. SARA: What? MISSY: Like you’re all superior because you see her and I don’t. SARA: You said it….I didn’t. MISSY: It’s a lump of light and shadows! SARA: So you say. Go away and leave me alone with my lump. MISSY: Ok ok. (pause for a few moments as they both peer at the relfection again) Er….how long has….ahr….Mary and the ah…..baby been here? SARA: A few nights now….if you must know. I noticed her earlier in the week when I was coming out of the bank. MISSY: Uh huh. Have you been here every night since? SARA: Yes. MISSY: And? SARA: And what? MISSY: Does she do anything? SARA: Like what? MISSY: I don’t know. Does she talk to you or shoot free throws or something? SARA: No. MISSY: She just sits there? SARA: She’s standing actually. MISSY: So you…what?…..you stand here and pray I guess? SARA: Yes. MISSY: (noticing it) The rosary? SARA: Yes. MISSY: I haven’t prayed the rosary since I was a kid. SARA: (sniffs) Who would have guessed? MISSY: Would you rather be alone? SARA: (bitter) It’s a free country. MISSY: Yea. (long pause) Um..how long do you plan on coming out? SARA: As long as she’s here. MISSY: How come nobody else is here? SARA: Nobody else knows about it yet. MISSY: You tell anybody? SARA: Nope. MISSY: Why not? SARA: They’ll come on their own. MISSY: Build it and they will come…..right? SARA: Yea….something like that. MISSY: Pretty selfish to be hogging the Mother of God all to yourself. SARA: (childlike)
Well I saw her first!
(immediately embarrassed) MISSY: You know….she’s supposed to have a calming influence. (another long pause) Er….how long do you stay? SARA: Where? MISSY: Here….when you…uh….converse with Mary? SARA: A few hours. MISSY: What happens to her in the day? SARA: What do you mean? MISSY: Where does she…you know….go? SARA: She disappears. MISSY: (jumping on this) If it really is Mary why would she disappear in the daytime? Doesn’t that prove that it’s the streetlight shining on the board? SARA: No. MISSY: Well where does she go? SARA: When? MISSY: In the daytime? SARA: (yelling at her now) How should I know. The woman didn’t give me her schedule! MISSY: You don’t have to get so defensive. SARA: Stop trying to talk me out of this. MISSY: Maybe I’ve been sent as a test of faith. SARA: (derisively) And maybe you’re just staggering home from the bar. MISSY: Now that’s not nice! SARA: Look….it’s not everyday Mary and the baby Jesus show up in Peckville….so I’m just taking advantage….Ok? MISSY: Alright alright.. It can’t hurt I suppose.(long pause) But tell me…how do you know it’s Mary and the baby Jesus? SARA: What? MISSY: I mean….let’s presume that a woman holding a baby has suddenly materialized on a Peckville Pennsylvania backboard halfway down a one way alley. How do you know it’s Mary? SARA: (stunned) Who the hell else would it be? MISSY: Have you ruled everybody else out? SARA: What? MISSY: You know…..how do you know it’s not Angelina Jolie or somebody like that? SARA: I won’t stand here and let you blaspheme the Virgin Mother! MISSY: Ok Ok….maybe that’s not a fair comparison. But maybe it’s…you know….maybe it’s the lady who lives in the house…..or maybe it’s Condi Rice or something. SARA: Condi Rice doesn’t have a kid. MISSY: Good point. SARA: It’s Mary. Just look at her. MISSY: Yes…I see her. But you’ve never seen Mary….so how do you know it’s her? SARA: I’ve seen Mary. MISSY: Where? SARA: Pictures. MISSY: I think Ann Bancroft played her one time in the movies. SARA: No, she played Mary Magdalene. MISSY: Oh yea…that’s right. SARA: In “Jesus of Nazareth”. MISSY: Yea. Who played Mary in that one? SARA: Not sure. But whoever she it was she’s a dead ringer for the woman on the backboard. MISSY: Have you ever heard of a Pareidolia? SARA: A what? MISSY: A Pareidolia. It’s a type of illusion or misperception involving a vague or obscure stimulus being perceived as something clear and distinct. SARA: No…I’m afraid you got me there. MISSY: I’m not sure why I know that…..but then I don’t get out much. SARA: Apparently not. MISSY: I think that’s what you got here. SARA: Really? MISSY: Yes. SARA: Well…..if you don’t mind….I’ll see the Virgin Mary, and you see your parallelogram or whatever. MISSY: Pareidolia. (pause here) I read somewhere where somebody claimed to see Mary’s face in a cinnamon bun. SARA: That wasn’t Mary….it was Mother Teresa. MISSY: Oh. Well….don’t you think that’s odd? SARA: What? MISSY: Mother Teresa appearing in the guise of a cinnamon bun? SARA: Yes, of course it’s odd. MISSY: Well? SARA: Well what? MISSY: Don’t you think this is odd? SARA: What…..this conversation? MISSY: No…us standing out here in the freezing cold looking at Ann Bancroft on a backboard. SARA: I told you that Ann Bancroft played Mary Magdalene! MISSY: Oh yea….that’s right. SARA: Look….nobody is making you stay. MISSY: I read a story about some guy who claimed the image of Vladimir Lenin was seared into his shower curtain. (no reaction) It’s freezing out here. Why can’t she come in the summer? (no reaction) You know….if that streetlight goes out the image is gonna disappear. SARA: No it’s not. MISSY: What do you mean? It’s pointed right at the board. It’s a reflection from that streetlight. SARA: No…it’s the Virgin Mary. MISSY: I remember workers at a candy factory
finding Mary in a 2 inch tall column of chocolate drippings.(they stare
at one another) SARA: And? MISSY: And what? SARA: What’s your point? MISSY: Nothing…..just….you know…..Mary seems to really get around that’s all. Catholic right? SARA: If I wasn’t would I be standing here? MISSY: Good point. I’m Catholic too. SARA: Really? MISSY: Yes…..recovering actually. 16 years of Catholic school really put the zap on my head. SARA: I would think a Catholic with that much education would have more faith. MISSY: Jesuits. SARA: Oh. Never mind then. MISSY: I got beat up by a nun once. SARA: I’m not surprised. MISSY: My leg was sticking out in the aisle when we were in 3rd grade and she tripped over it. Went down like a ton of bricks. Got up and looked crazed….like Linda Blair….I swear she was speaking in tongues. Kicked my ass in front of the entire class. I went home and told my mother and she said if I got beat by a nun I must have deserved it. SARA: Do you go to mass? MISSY: No. SARA: Figures. MISSY: Well….sometimes I go. Easter and Christmas and when people die and stuff. SARA: (not impressed) Uh huh. MISSY: I feel bad about it sometimes. SARA: Not bad enough obviously. MISSY: Life gets busy. You know what Lennon says. “Living is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” SARA: The guy on the shower curtain? MISSY: No no…that was Vladamir. I’m talking about John. SARA: The Beatle? MISSY: Yes. SARA: Oh. (pause) Well…that is a pretty good line. MISSY: Yea…he got off a good one every now and then. Better than “goo goo ga jube”. SARA: Paul was my favorite Beatle. He can show up on my shower curtain anytime. MISSY: No talking dirty in front of the Virgin. SARA: Sorry. (they laugh together) I’m sorry. I never got your name. MISSY: Missy. SARA: I’m Sara. Missy….it just seems to me that the more questions you have….the more time you should put aside to ask them…that’s all. MISSY: I tried…but could never think of anything to say after….(long pause) SARA: After what? MISSY: Oh…..my husband passed away. Healthy as a horse one minute….dead of a heart attack the next. It seemed perverse to me. He was everything ….and he wasn’t just taken away, he was ripped away. I wondered what kind of God would do that to somebody He loved. So I just figured he didn’t love me. And if you don’t love me, I’m not gonna love you back. (long pause) I don’t know why I’m telling you this. SARA: Sometimes it’s good to talk. MISSY: (anxious to change the subject) Well Sara…you must have some unfinished business if you’re standing in the middle of a dark alley every night saying the rosary in front of a basketball hoop. SARA: I look for signs. MISSY: And Mary on a backboard alas qualifies? SARA: Bet your ass it does. MISSY: Do you look for them or do you reach for them? I would think there’s a big difference. SARA: Well Sigmund….I’ve been diagnosed with terminal cancer….so I don’t have time to make those kinds of distinctions. MISSY: (startled…genuine) I’m sorry. SARA: (vacantly staring ahead) So am I. I guess I should be mad….but for some reason I’m not. I don’t think God sits up there saying…..let’s give Sara cancer….or let’s take Missy’s husband away from her. I think he says…..”let’s let things take their course, and see how they react to it.” Even His own son prayed for special consideration….you know….(quoting scripture) ”Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from my lips.” If the Son of God suffered…who am I to ask for special favors? MISSY: But you’re here…..asking to be healed. SARA: (turns to face her) I never said that. MISSY: You didn’t have to. SARA: (with feeling) What’s life without hope Missy? Tell me that? I don’t want the cup to just pass from my lips. I want to break it into a million pieces against the damn wall. I refuse to live without hope. How can anybody do that? MISSY: Watch yourself. You’re asking the expert now. SARA: I saw you here last night too. MISSY: (startled) What? SARA: You were hovering. MISSY: Grown women do not hover. SARA: You hovered from a distance. I saw you. Hovering is not something somebody with no hope does. MISSY: This is crazy. SARA: You know what another word for hope is? Faith. MISSY: Don’t be bible thumping me now. SARA: You think you lost it but you haven’t. MISSY: (goes off) All the hope in the world won’t bring my husband back to me. Mary on a goddamned backboard won’t bring my husband back to me. It’s all smoke and mirrors. A light show. And you’re standing out here praying to a damned piece of fiberglass to make your cancer go away. Where did all that faith get us? Me totally alone….and you bald at 40….puking in your toilet bowl. SARA: Thanks….I like to be reminded of my chemotherapy. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. MISSY: (sincere)Ah jeez I’m sorry. That was over the line. SARA: So what are you doing here then? (long pause now…..it’s MISSY who is staring straight ahead now. She answers almost in a whisper) MISSY: Sara….I’m hanging on by my fingernails. SARA: Beats falling. (long pause now…..they both look towards the light) MISSY: (peering intently now) That thing is kinda freaky. SARA: What? MISSY: That….thing. SARA: You mean Mary? MISSY: Yea. I can kinda make out the baby Jesus now. Under her chin right? SARA: Yes. MISSY: What’s she wearing on her head? SARA: A shawl. MISSY: I wish I had a shawl. I’m freezing. SARA: Want some coffee? MISSY: You have coffee? SARA: Sure. I bring a thermos with me when I come. MISSY: I’ll take some. Maybe this place will turn into the new Lourdes. SARA: I doubt it. MISSY: You know how many jobs that would mean to the area? SARA: We could use some of those. MISSY: Damn right. SARA: Don’t curse in front of the Virgin Mother. MISSY: Sorry. (they share coffee and stare ahead…suddenly a light
offstage goes out) SARA: Streetlight just went out. MISSSY: It did? SARA: Yep. MISSY: (verifies this….puts 2 and 2 together and is now stunned) But….the reflection is still there. There’s no light and it’s still there! SARA: I know. MISSY: Jesus Christ! SARA: You’re half right. (they look at each other) Lights End of Play |
